Saturday 27 July 2013

That informal chat

    All change at work. My boss, a 30 year veteran, is retiring at the end of August. I will miss her insights and experience, she's taught me a lot. 
    So meet the new boss. Almost the same as the old boss, in fact I'm being moved slightly sideways. My new boss isn't such a veteran, in fact she's slightly younger than me. And one other thing, she doesn't yet know about me. Rather unusual, for someone who's cultivated a life of being quietly out to head off anything malicious I've missed this particular person.
    So time for a quiet morning coffee. To her credit, she didn't bat an eyelid. More than she bargained for I think, the prospect that her new report might transition. Interesting times.
    I have on the whole reached a good position with respect to being out as transgender. Anyone who matters knows, and that's fine by me. It reduces my stress and it would make it very difficult for anyone to gossip about me, both of which were my aims in doing it. 
    Not for the first time, I feel rather lucky.

6 comments:

  1. Glad it went well!

    I learned - not long after my own transition had begun in 2008 - that in my Department official procedures, and an officially-supported trans organisation, had already existed when I was srill working there, which means pre May 2005. It had been below my personal radar, because I was just too busy to look into what exactly was happening in the area of Diversity. Apart from that, my eureka moment of self-realisation was still unsuspected and in the future.

    It's a bit galling to think that if I'd known I was trans sooner, coming out at work would have been accomplished using a proper comprehensive procedure that nobody could have flouted without automatic disciplinary measures coming into play to protect me and punish them. Oh well, a chance missed.

    It strikes me that the best thing about being retired is not the leisure, nor the guaranteed income every month, but freedom from obligation. No need to pander to anyone, no need to impress anyone, nor appease or pursuade anyone. I never, while employed, felt I could risk being outspoken. Now, if ever I do take on a job, I will have the exquisite pleasure of saying 'stuff your horrible job' if I feel the need. Except that in real life I'd probably be OK and never have a crisis like that to contend with. Damn. There were times in the past when I would have loved to have thrown that in a manager's face, and storm out! Pointless to think about it now, of course.

    Lucy

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  2. It is such a shame that anyone should feel the need to justify themselves to others and that is why we now have laws in place to prevent discrimination but it is prudent nevertheless to nip any would-be problems in the bud by outing one's self. I hope your new bosses dealings with you will be completely unaffected by what you have revealed to her.

    Shirley Anne x

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  3. Nothing to stop the world seeing the full bloom some time soon...

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  4. Sounds more like good planning than luck to me.

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  5. Some people have the line that one shouldn't out oneself at all costs. Fair enough. In my case as the scruffy bloke I am under no threat, and as the oversized girl I'd be fooling nobody.

    It's funny, I've only realised in recent months that for the first time in my life I carry no secrets. Took me several years for that to sink in.

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  6. And, lucky you are! I'm glad things are going OK.

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