How's it gone? Very well. Beautifully normal.
If you're full-time, you have no alternative but to just seize the role and go with it. All those worries and uncertainties have to be faced up to and overcome, for the alternative is that the boundaries of your world shrink to almost nothing and you can't get anything done. Hardly the point of Real Life Experience, is it.
So that's what I did. Just got on with it. Four days in the office, one in London going to the GIC, and two days back at my parents place doing farm stuff.
I like my office. My colleagues wear everything from the catwalk look to the dishevelled academic look so as long as what I wear is appropriate for someone of my age and height I can wear the widest variety of outfits without looking out of place. I wore the dress in the picture on Monday because I could for the first time in my working life, but I could get away with everything from comfy jeans to million-dollar-meeting power dressing. Somehow I suspect the former will become my norm though.
London was fun. A lot of firsts: trains, the Tube, London shopping, walking through Hyde Park. Which all seemed as natural as anything as of course it should, as all those things were hardly new to the old me. It was too hot though. I didn't get my outfit half as wrong as the other GIC patient in her black suit and heavy makeup, but despite my summery top I wished I'd worn some lightweight trousers instead of jeans. Still, at least half of London's natal women were in the same position.
To be honest, the surprise was my invisibility. I can't believe nobody saw me or that nobody clocked me, but despite my lingering worries nobody took any notice of me. Except for one group, the few women of similar height to me I passed in the street. Without exception they noticed me, checked me out and made eye contact.
Women do not make eye contact with unknown men in the street, so this was entirely new to me. I have it seems effortlessly joined the Very Tall Women's Club.
The GIC appointment was routine. See the doc, hand over the paperwork, ask for a voice and fertility clinic referral, get appointment for February.
So that's me set then. I never thought this would happen.
Welcome to wonderful world of womanhood. It surprised me just how easy it was and I am glad that you have found the same.
ReplyDeletePlease for you Jenny. Glad it went so well :)
ReplyDelete:)
ReplyDeleteOne of the biggest things I noticed when I first transitioned is that everything was just so normal. Wonderful isn't it?
Stace
Sounds like you had a great trip to London.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure about you but my first trip on the Tube was my biggest worry when I went up last. All those people packed together and not knowing if you'd be read or what anyone would say. In the end it was pretty much a non-event. Everyone seems to keep to them so much unless their actually with someone.
A good point about the eye contact. I think you're right about the tall girls considering you as one of themselves. I don't absolutely know, but I would imagine that they too feel somewhat awkward about their height, and need to know that there are other tall girls out there.
ReplyDeleteBut nevertheless, warm congratulations on such success in your first full-time week!
Lucy
Many congratulations Jenny, so glad you made it! I'll wager you will be thinking why you didn't go for it sooner, I know I did! All those months of worry and fear blown straight out of the window and gone forever, wonderful isn't it? Best wishes for the rest of the journey. Love
ReplyDeleteShirley Anne x
Oh by the way I love that dress and you look gorgeous in it!
ReplyDeleteShirley Anne x
Dear Jenny, congratulations!!!!! You look great too :)
ReplyDeleteWhy on earth did we wait so long and worry about things which in the end simply do not matter?
ReplyDeleteWhat will you do with all that time which you once spent thinking about all the what ifs? Perhaps spend it wondering about the infinite number of outfits you can now wear to work...
I have this vision of you crushing cider apples in that lovely dress.
So happy for you.
Caroline xxx
I'll visit again. Never thought I'll see this. Congratulations, Jenny.
ReplyDeleteYou look beautiful.
Jenny,
ReplyDeleteCongratulations! It is awesome to read that you are in RLE and doing so darn well at it. Hopefully, the rest of the way will be pretty smooth and your appts. all go well. You look great in the picture, by the way. Very relaxed and at piece.
Might I ask, how has the local townfolks' reactions been so far?
Also, I really liked this quote but am not sure that I understood it: "All those worries and uncertainties have to be faced up to and overcome, for the alternative is that the boundaries of your world shrink to almost nothing and you can't get anything done. " Are you saying that if you don't face up to your worries and uncertainties, that your world boundaries will slip away or is it the opposite? Hope I don't come across as an airhead. : )
Proud of you and thank you for your inspiration these past few years.
From across the Pond,
Karin
That's an interesting one about the "Very Tall Women's Club" - you have already found a group to belong to! Dammit but you do look gorgeous, and so much more natural than I did at first.
ReplyDeleteNice! Lovely dress!
ReplyDeleteAnd, I do want to see a picture of you when you wear that "million-dollar-meeting (not Pounds?) power dressing outfit!
Hi all, and thank you for your lovely comments. Careful, you'll give me a swelled head!
ReplyDeleteAnother week in and it's still going very well. I know a negative experience is waiting for me somewhere, but nothing thus far fortunately. I've been at my folks this week - arranged ages ago to do some stuff, nothing to do with my mother - and as well as normal errands in town I've been doing farm stuff in the jeans and tunic top look. Live the RLE dream! :)
My comment about boundaries was in reference to those people who become near-recluses on transition because they dare not go out. You have to do everything you'd normally do in this lark.