Wednesday, 19 January 2011

Having your candle burned at both ends

    Things have been a little quiet here of late, haven't they. I'd love to lay the blame on the ceaseless social whirl of a mad lifestyle that leaves me simply too busy to sit down, but unfortunately nothing so exciting is to blame.
    No, my problem is my old friend insomnia, this time with an unpleasant twist. Previously I've always had few problems getting to sleep, my issue has been with waking up in the small hours. The recent twist has been that I'm finding myself unable to get to sleep in the first place. My candle is being burned at both ends and I'm fast descending into zombiedom. In the past I've spent early waking hours writing here, this time I'm just too tired to do that. It's not that my usual supply of things I'd like to write about has dried up, it's just that when presented with a keyboard I'm gazing at it blankly with a feeling of a head full of mashed potato. My medication isn't helping me just at the moment, something that happens from time to time for a few days.
    So my lucky doctor is probably going to be seeing me again before too long. Not so bad, I was encouraged to receive an email from him last week. It would seem I am no longer the only gender variant patient at his practice, and he was asking me for details of support resources that he could pass on. I gave him the Swindon support group, plus some online resources. I hope they help his patient or any other patients the practice has in the future, and maybe I will encounter then before long. It is encouraging to find that the practice are anxious to get it right for us.
   Previously when I have had insomnia attacks this severe I have kept going through. I am not convinced I have given my best at work by doing that so this time I may take a sick day from work to catch up on sleep if it continues. It's out of character for me, I think I could count my sick days of an entire career on my fingers, but I think it makes sense. Better to be more awake when I am at work than to be half asleep.


  1. Jenny, there's nothing wrong with taking a 'mental health day' occasionally whether for sleep or just some needed 'head' cleaning. Sleep is one of those things we just can't do without and it's miserable when 0200 rolls around and one is wide awake. Hope you get that needed sleep.

    Hugs, Elly

  2. Sorry to learn you are still having sleep problems Jenny. If you were to deliberately miss a night's sleep do you think you'd be able to sleep soundly the following night? If it were me I would probably go for a run and tire myself out that way but if it isn't simply a case of not enough physical tiredness it can only be that you have an over active mind. This also happens to me sometimes and it is useless fighting it. The best cure for that is to engage your mind in reading a book, watching television (enough to put anyone asleep) or a movie. It usually works for me and I have missed the end of many a good movie doing that! Perhaps you should start working nights instead! LOL. Seriously though, I hope it gets better for you.

    Shirley Anne xxx

  3. I can sympathize with you Jenny. I usually have at least one night a week, where I'll go to bed and two hours later I'm still wide awake. When that happens, I just get up and watch TV or play solitair on the computer until I get sleepy enough, the go back to bed. That happened this past Sunday night. It was 6:00 AM before I was ready to fall asleep. Fortunately I'm retired, so I can do that. When I was working, I would just have to soldier on through the day, even though I was exhausted. A couple Benadryl (diphenhydramine) will make me groggy enough to fall asleep, but it takes about 12 hours to wear off, so even though I get a good nights sleep, I stay groggy until noon the next day. I hope your doctor can provide you with some relief.

    Melissa XX

  4. Seems to be something in the air, Monday I struggled to get to sleep (to the pont where I went to sleep in the spare room so tha I did not interupt Mrs Stace). I wasn't the only one it seemed when I got to the office...

    Hope you get over it soon, and leave the groggyness behind.


  5. Morning all, and thanks for your comments. I am pleased to report that I managed a full night's sleep last night, though it'll take a few days further to reach equilibrium.

    Now I have a couple of week's emails to catch up on.

  6. Same problem here for me this past week. Been waking up really early...4 AM or so and can't get back to sleep. I have just been a zombie at work with no energy left to blog about anything. And, I might add that feeling like this just cranks the GD up to a point where it is off the map.

    I hope you feel a bit better next week, Jenny.

    Calie xxx

  7. Thanks Calie, I seem to be getting my sleep back together now. A large backlog of stuff to deal with as a result.

    Hope yours breaks soon too.