Thursday, 19 May 2011

Orange seagulls

    Getting out of a car without flashing the world is not easy when you have very long legs and have decided that it's warm enough to break out the floaty number. Oh the tribulations of the oversized!
    Last night brought an unexpected chance for an evening out presenting female, as my wife was at a friend's place the same evening as a regular t-girl gathering at a very nice restaurant pub near Reading. So a quick phone call to my friend Dawn, and we piled into the Rollerskate for a blast down the motorway.
    There is something I still find incongruous about doing something like going to a pub that is normal for me as a scruffy bloke, yet as a woman. It makes me laugh as well as the satisfaction of presenting the way I feel, to look down and see this girl, where there used to be this bloke. And when I pass unnoticed in broad daylight it just gets funnier. I'm glad it works that way for me, knowing other people in my situation who to my mind look a million times better than me yet who are gripped by terror at the thought of venturing beyond a safe space, my just seizing the moment and going with it is infinitely preferable.
     Last night's gathering was a chance to dress up a little. Or more to the point, dress up, but not a lot. One of the fortunate things about our community is that you can almost never be overdressed, but it pays not to overdo it. As always my outfit had to pass the "would a natal woman like me wear this" test, and I hope with a knee-length summer dress, smart LTS jacket and no heels I didn't draw attention to myself. There was another "These people must be really unobservant!" moment on the way into the pub, but I guess the blokes with their eyes on a cool pint of Stella Artois just didn't give us - a tall woman and her old lady friend - a second look on their way to the bar.
     It is always something of a smack in the face to remove the trappings of femininity after such an outing. I needed last night badly having spent the last week or two in something of a state, but every time going out as girl becomes a little easier to do and putting it away afterwards becomes that little bit more of a wrench.
     Driving back home through town the car was surrounded by wheeling seagulls in the orange sodium light. The tourists and revelers leave discarded food everywhere and our feathered friends turn up after hours and clean it all up most efficiently. To be honest I was glad of them, they took my mind off more annoying matters. Gulls are not birds you want to get on the wrong side of, but close-to in flight, especially on an atmospheric evening in a near-empty town centre, they are quite a sight. I wish I could call them up to banish the girl blues at other times.


  1. Returning to the male facade is always the hardest part.

  2. Waking up the next day and putting on your male clothes does start to get you down after a point.

    As for the fear... I panic in the car as I park, but once I swing my legs out of the door (trying to make sure that nothing is on display!) I relax.

    As for gulls... I hate the things, the ones where my parents live are massive birds, and attack anything black and white. Such as someone wearing the clothes I do when running! Ug.

    Glad you had a good night out.


  3. The girls have that one right. It is a wrench having to revert to male mode and yes, it does get harder each time. I used to hate it. The important thing is Jenny, you got to enjoy your femininty with no problems.
    The thing I hate about gulls (and we get lots of them here on the coast), is the size of their droppings! Our garden is full of them! LOL.

    Shirley Anne xxx

  4. Why woulkd you and Dawn Get any bad attension ?? you are both lovily

  5. Evening all, and thank you for your comments.

    Oh yeah, coming down. Annoying. But yes, I appreciate the fact that I can go out as girl in the first place.

    Thanks, I know Dawn looks great, but I can't disguise my size. I may not attract bad attention but people are always going to notice me.

  6. Just make sure you have good tread on those heels, Jenny, should the slope get slippery.