Monday, 23 August 2010

When Drunken Wasps Attack!

    The earliest apples are now just about over at my parents place. I spent a while at the weekend harvesting some of them, a cooker called White Transparent. As always at this time of year, the wasps have moved in on the ripest fruit and since this year has been a bumper year for wasps this means that half the fruit were mostly eaten already. Each one would have a hole in the side through which you could see a mass of wasps busily hollowing out the flesh.
    Not just wasps, but drunken wasps. It seems I'm not the only one who makes cider, the stomach of a wasp is the perfect place for a drop of apple juice to ferment.
    As I reached up to pick one apple the wasp-filled one next to it detached itself from the tree, bounced on my shoulder and rolled down my arm. I could see the wasps inside it spinning round as it rolled, as if in a Hanna-Barbera cartoon like Fred Flintstone and Barney Rubble trying to wrestle something from Dino. For a moment I had drunken wasps being thrown from it at all angles, bouncing off my clothing to land helpless on the grass.
    It seems wasps are not belligerent drunks, I doubt any of them would remember where their sting was, let alone how to use it. I couldn't help laughing, both at the antics of the unfortunate insects and as nervous relief at avoiding so many of them without being stung.
    And all for an apple pie which with luck I'll be making this evening. I hope my wife enjoys it, given what I had land on me to secure it.


  1. So a pub for wasps is just down at the local apple tree, then. I love the phrase 'drunken wasps', and glad none of them landed on you.

    Mmmm, apple pie ... I've got some in the fridge which my friend and I are about to demolish - I bet it's not as tasty as yours though!

  2. I'm happy to here that your wasps aren't belligerent drunks.
    Maybe you could send me a few, to reform my sober brown wasps and yellow jackets, or maybe I could just set out some cider. Hmmmm........

    I did throw a couple of old apples out into the yard for the squirrels the other day, but it seemed that the yellow jackets claimed them first! I'll take your word for it that drunken wasps are benign creatures, but like alcohol and guns, the idea of alcohol and wasps, seems like a very dangerous prospect.

    Melissa XX

  3. I couldn't resist this post title :)

    The pie was very good, thanks.

    I'm sure the wasps would be belligerent, were they not so completely wasted. These insects can barely walk, let alone fly or sting. There are bound to be some waspish headaches the next day.

  4. LOL! Oh God, you are funny, Jenny!

    Melissa XX

  5. What Melissa said (in her second comment)!

    Geez, that pie sounds good, to go with some of that cider. I do need to make that visit someday. :)

    Calie xxx

  6. We're onto the second phase of cropping now, later fruiting trees. Fewer wasps, there is more for them elsewhere now. And tonight will see another apple pie. Don't worry, we're still envious of your figs and grapes. :)