Thursday, 22 July 2010


    As part of T-Central's series on transitioning, a week or so ago Calie asked me to pen a piece detailing  my take on staying just the way I am. Today she's published it, so if you haven't seen it then I suggest you go over and read it, and if you're arriving here for the first time from T-Central then hello and welcome.
    As part of her introduction, Calie wrote the following:
I asked Jenny, currently a non-transitioner, to do a guest post. 
    Currently? I could thank her for the vote of confidence in my likelihood of success at this endeavour, but in fact especially given what I wrote in the piece, it's a fair assessment. I once knew a former alcoholic who had dropped the booze overnight when told in no uncertain terms by his doctor it was killing him, like most reformed alcoholics he never went near alcohol again because he recognised how easily he could fall off the wagon. Acknowledging this made him stronger in his battle, just as acknowledging that there are circumstances in which I could give up on this one helps define the path I'm taking to hang in there for my wife.


  1. I guess I am attracted to your blog because you are a 'non transitioner' and I feel an affinity.

    As life goes on we have experiences, and we adapt our lives based on what we have learnt. From an early age I wanted to do what the girls were doing, wanted to wear what the girls were wearing, while at the same time I instinctively wanted to do other things with the girls that you can't do till you are sixteen.

    You accept your lot and deal with it as best you can, and how you deal with things leads you to an impression of what is normal. But all the while things are changing, and you are adapting to the new situations. Your outlook and the way you perceive the world changes.

    I have done enough 'Man' to get a moderately comfortable life, but the more I do 'Girl', and it is girl as I have not done enough of it to be 'Woman', I realise how much more I can achieve than I ever realised. It is amazing how much more attractive people become when they encounter you in girl mode.

    My thoughts though are always moderated by the experiences of my friends who have transitioned with their complications.

    In the end I satisfy myself that I don't need to transition to be a Lesbian! Are there any good role models for us non-transitioners? I still live in hope of finding one.

    Suzie x

  2. I've just linked to your post on T-Central from my sister blog, The Circle of the Sea which is new-ish. As always I appreciate your honesty and humour.

  3. @Suzie: I hope I'm finding a stable state in all this. There are times when it feels like running up a down escalator. Fortunately I have very long legs :)

    @Josie: Thank you very much! You've also given me the much-needed prod to get over there, subscribe and read it.

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  5. You know, Jenny, I think that maybe when I used the word "currently" it was a Freudian slip.

    Sorry about that. Thanks for writing.

    Calie xxx