Here's to St. Valentine!

Enough heavy stuff. On to important matters. Clothes.

It's that magic time of year again. Blokes, even oversized undercover transgendered blokes, can go into lingerie stores and buy stuff and nobody bats an eyelid. Here's to St. Valentine!

I can't miss this opportunity so I shall certainly find my way to my local well-known quality specialist lingerie chain store over the next week or two. Trouble is, I can't just buy for myself, my wife will slaughter me is she finds I've been there and not bought her anything. So I'll have to buy different stuff in two distinct sizes.

Logic dictates that I should buy each from two separate stores. But the mischief-maker in me can't help thinking it would be fun to buy both at once. Now, do I go with the truth, or "That one's for my wife and that one's for my mistress"?

Good luck shopping, and remember: thinking about a joke helps a lot when you are nervous.